*"Wanna see me naked?"
-No! But thank you for your kind and generous offer.
*"Ayo gurl r u a beaver?! Cuz dam!!!"
-If he had spelled a higher percentage of words in his message right, we'd be getting married right now. I love a good pun.
*"Lmao. Omg I love girls who cuss. I dunno why. It's just funny as fuk."
-I feel like a creature in a zoo. Girls who CUSS. What a novelty! It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs.
*"Maybe we can do something spontaneous together sometime."
-You want to make a plan to do something spontaneous? That seems a bit contradictory.
*And my personal favorite for the pure ridiculousness began with, "I don't normally do this, but..."
-YOU'RE ON A FUCKING ONLINE DATING SITE YOU DORK. COME UP WITH A NEW LINE.