Saturday, May 11, 2013

Abercrombie & Fat Bitches

I've known for years that Abercrombie & Fitch is not a place I wish to shop.

I mean, I'm not gonna lie to you. In middle school, when I was developing too early and I had fat bulging out in all the right and wrong places, I wished I could shop there. I envied my stick thin friends who pranced around in tiny shorts and dresses from A&F, and more than once I stepped foot into those hallowed halls, reeking of strong cologne, walls plastered with idealized, half naked bodies. I'd try on everything I could, and finally leave clutching a bag with more fantasy images containing one or two of their t-shirts. No doubt emblazoned with the logo, so I could show it off.

But I grew out of that era quickly, luckily.

An anonymous commenter requested I weigh in on the whole Abercrombie CEO hating fat chicks thing.

I mean...what da fuck, yeah. Seriously. But also...yeah, and this is news?

I knew it then, at ages eleven and twelve, bespectacled and tubby, and Mike Jeffries is just confirming it now (or in 2006, when he made these comments): Abercrombie is for the cool kids.

This is not a surprise to me.

I mean, obviously this is goddamn bullshit and I'm outraged. Abercrombie doesn't make women's clothing in an XL or XXL, 'cause you know, fat chicks be gross, y'all. Jeffries said some disgusting things I care not to repeat here because I AM A FUCKING LADY. Everyone who has half a brain should never step foot in one of these stores again. Burn 'em to the ground...metaphorically, by withholding your dollar.

But getting riled up about it is exactly what a supreme alpha male douchebag like this Jeffries creature probably expected back in, god, 2006, when I was a mere child graduating high school...shit. He wants controversy, and attention, and all these impressionable so called "cool kids" to aspire to not be gross normal fatties like us and want to wear his clothes. Which is a tragic state of affairs for our society, but I fear I may speaketh the truth.

So don't shop there. And don't cave to this ideal, this message he's trying to send. It's health, not perfection, it's happiness, not "cool". Be you, not some Abercrombiebot.

And fuck you, Mike Jeffries.

No one wants to see some perfectly skinny airbrushed fantasy right now, right?

Let's check out some abs.


Apologizes to any male readers I am currently making feel bad with my
objectification and promotion of perfect male ideals. But DAMN. 

1 comment:

  1. See, being old, I always thought A&F was strictly for cool gay guys. 'Cuz, you know, their advertising, models, and pretty much everything else about them.

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