It's Linkin' Time

28 Dogs That Know Exactly How You Feel This Morning

*Or afternoon.

23 Puppies Stuck On The Work Week

WHERE ARE YOU, FRIDAY?

The Baby-Sitters Club: Where Are They Now?

This. Is. Epic. SO brilliant, so honest, so believable. Oh Stacey, you were always my favorite.

27 Reasons Darla Is The Best Vampire In The Buffyversee

I can get behind this, at least LADY vampires. Spike will still always own my heart

First Listen: Music From Baz Luhrmann's Film 'The Great Gatsby'

The ENTIRE soundtrack this time. IT'S SO GOOD. And I officially like the Florence song now that I've heard the whole thing, though it's not my favorite of hers.

The 12 Ways We Are Amanda Knox

I've been fascinated with this case for years, since Amanda Knox went to my university. I definitely want to read her book, I think it will be pretty fascinating and this article makes it sound like she's very honest and forthright in the book. For the record, I think she's innocent.

I’m still here: back online after a year without the internet

This was a great read, and so appropriate for me right now as I thoroughly and completely fail at my Screen Free Week. Which I will try again. Just...not now.

Am I The One?

There's one thing I think almost every girl wonders, and maybe every person wonders.

Is there anyone in this great wide universe who thinks they're the one who got away?

It's kind of the ultimate fantasy. The idea that there's someone out there who imagines you as their ideal partner, a never-forgotten opportunity, a missing soulmate. It's the ego boost of it, the thought that you're special, you're different, you've remained perfect in the memory of someone lost in yours. Who doesn't want that?

I'm not sure I hold that place in anyone's heart, honestly. For awhile, yes, I think I did, but not now, and I'm so fine with that. I don't want to be that person's one.

But I'd like to be someone's one.

Then again, I don't have my own. There's no one in my past that I miss desperately, that I wish things could have worked out with, or with who I dream of a second chance. I mean, sure, I may occasionally let my thoughts drift to the Ginger but that's only because he was the last man I had feelings for, and my palate has yet to be cleansed.

Someone cleanse my palate, please? Mama needs some romance.

I'd like to be someone's one.

Well, temporarily. And then I'll break their little heart, and they'll think of me always.

This Week's NSVs

*My sister told me her boyfriend said I'm the skinniest he's ever seen me.
*She also said she doesn't think I look 145 and thought I looked like her weight, which was nice of her to tell me.
*I put on a tank-top I haven't worn in awhile. I used to wear it to smooth the lumps out and it was skin tight, and now it's baggy.
*I tried on my skinniest skinny goal jeans, a hand-me-down from the Biff, and they actually fit and buttoned. I mean, I could never wear them out of the house or sit or breathe, but they BUTTONED.
*I'm feeling better and energized and ready to go back to yoga tomorrow.
*I didn't weigh myself today for the first day in a long time, and I don't think I'll weigh in for my WW check-in tomorrow. I just don't want to know.

The Reset Button

You know my very favorite thing about Weight Watchers?

The reset button.

Every week, you get to hit it and start over. Bam. It's done. New week, new batch of weekly points, new chance to earn activity points and get your shit right. Wipe the slate clean. Tabula rasa.

My problem is, if I mess up, I can't really hit a mental reset until my Weight Watchers week is actually over. I'm sure I could if someone held a gun to my head, but you know, behaviorally, on my own, I just...can't. I tried today and I failed, I was tempted by the Wednesday lunch pasta and desserts, and my self-defeatist attitude.

It doesn't matter how long I've been at this, I still get stuck in the same self-destructive behaviors.

Self-demeaning.

Self-demolishing.

But I want to break that phone. Just break it.

It's such a cliche, the way my brain trips me up, when I stumble I want to fall, when I eat a little I think, might as well eat a lot.

I'm a case study in cray.

I know I'll try tomorrow, and maybe I'll succeed, but I'll probably fail. Maybe that's negative thinking, or maybe it's just realistic. I already know there will be booze and appetizers after work, so I know I'm in for a hard day.

But I also know on Friday, when my week starts over once again, I'll be infused with a fresh batch of motivation, and I'll be ready to face a new week with a new attitude.

This is what we decided in therapy tonight. Maybe I don't have to be so hard on myself about this one thing (well, all things, but this one thing in particular). Maybe I can allow myself this habit, this ritual or quirk, and know it works for me. I like symbolism, I love my new week and my fresh slate, and I need to let myself wait for that moment.

I just love my button, and I know on Friday, I will reset.

Journey Into My Power

Weeks and weeks and WEEKS ago, I bought the recommended book for my yoga teacher training program, "Journey Into Power: How To Sculpt Your Ideal Body, Free Your True Self, and Transform Your Life with Yoga" by Baron Baptiste. Pretty lofty promises, eh?

I could have paid full price and used my two day Amazon Prime shipping, but I was attempting to be fiscally responsible, so I bought a used copy. And then it took a century to get here, so really, the lesson I learned was NEVER BUY ANYTHING CHEAP.

Yup.

But it finally arrived, and I am so happy, because now I can start my preparations for class! I read the preface today at lunch, and I just know the book is going to speak to me right on my level.

Choice quotes:

"Sharing what you know makes it more real, more a living part of you." 

"I saw that if i stopped smothering my spirit and soul with external knowledge goals, I would actually start feeling, and ultimately healing." 

"...we don't have to take dogma so seriously. When we start too take it too seriously, outer mastery becomes the goal, and we are then chasing the illusion once again." 

"If we tune out the inner voice of wisdom in favor of what someone else is telling us, how can we ever really be in our own power?" 

"The only person who can open the door to inner truths and lead you to the light is yourself."

Black and White World

Crack Food

I may have learned the limit on my cereal experiment.

Or maybe last night was just a fluke.

See, I bought Cinnamon Toast Crunch a few days ago. That used to be my favorite. And for a day or two, I was fine...then last night, bam. Three bowls.

Anomaly? Or a sign that I can't have sugary cereals in the house?

I woke up today feeling a bit defeated. Tempted to let myself slip a little, wondering what tasty things I could eat today to drag myself down just a little bit further, but I am going to try my darnedest NOT TO GIVE IN.

Maybe sugar really is like crack.

"Good things come and go..."

Featuring Charlie Fink of Noah & The Whale.

April Showers, Something About Flowers...

And when it rains, it pours, but it didn't rain, so it didn't pour.

My April goals? Yeah...it did not shower. Not even a sprinkle.

The only goal I achieved was averaging six posts a day. The rest...well. The word "fail" comes to mind, but I've used that one an awful lot recently, so let's go with the kinder, gentler, "under-performed".

I'm not going to do any goals for May.

SERIOUSLY HOW IS IT FREAKING MAY?!?!?

Right, goals. Clearly, they didn't really motivate me this past month, and I need to try a new tactic. We all know I'm insane, but I'm not so much so that I'm going to keep doing the same thing over and over if it's not working for me. So this month, I'm just chillin'. Doing what I want.

Wait, backtrack.

I have one goal: spend less money.

At the end of May, I want to MAKE IT RAIN.

Guten Morgen!

OH HELLO MORNING!

I am at the office early.

Like, the sun was barely up when I crawled out of bed early.

There's a whole lot of day ahead of me. I could chose to be a cranky pants starting at seven in the am, and eat something to comfort myself in this hour that was stolen from my Tree, or I could say HEY WORLD, LET'S BE FRIENDS.

I might be a bit delirious.

I chose the latter.