The Whole Menu

In case you've been curious, I thought I'd give you a peek into what I've been eating over the last week or so.

Amongst my new standards of hard boiled eggs, Cobb salads sans cheese, deli meat and sliced cucumbers, smoothies and fresh pressed juices, I've enjoyed some delicious, fancy-ish meals.

All without soy, or gluten, or dairy, or...anything joyful.

Shrimp kebabs with grilled veggies, steamed veggies, and a baked sweet potato from Chicken Dijon.

Chicken breast, sautéed garlic broccolini and two garlic fried eggs made by moi.

Oven roasted rosemary chicken and seasonal vegetables from C&O Trattoria in Venice.

Salad with cucumber, olives, orange pepper, sliced almonds, chicken breast and olive oil dressing  eaten at home. 

Salad with grilled pears, prosciutto and olive oil with baked salmon and brussel sprouts with lemon and bacon, made by my mama. 

Day 1/30: The Basics

My first day of The Whole 30 went pretty well! I wasn't prepared for the day (and by that I mean, my fridge was not prepared) but I did my best and ate pretty simply, and now I'm all set up for the rest of the week.

This morning I stopped at Ralph's on my way to work and got some stuff for the office as well as a a fresh juice for myself and a few other things. That was my breakfast, along with a banana.

My mid-morning snack was some smoked salmon and cucumber slices. A very tasty combo!

I headed to Trader Joe's at lunch and got the makings for some basic easy meals, and a crockpot soup I'm going to make tomorrow morning.

I had a little lunch at home, some roasted deli chicken, olives and a hard-boiled egg.

Later in the afternoon I had round two of salmon and cucumber, with some nuts for healthy fats!

For dinner, I had a TJ's frozen shrimp stirfry sauteed in coconut oil. SO delicious!

I feel satisfied and pleased with how my day went. Tomorrow I'll try for more variety and bulk in my food, but today was good. Go. Me. 

Burrito Bliss

Finally, finally, my dreams have come to fruition. After last month's heartbreak, I thought it they would never come to be, but they have. THEY HAVE.

SUSHI BURRITOS!

My Coworker BFF and I split a spider roll burrito and a lobster roll burrito, then a crispy rice/spicy tuna concoction which is always my favorite. SUPER TASTY. Highly recommended. If you're in LA, I say, get thee to the Jogasaki truck!

Oh, plus, I had a Thai Iced Tea.

Happy belly.

Thirsty Thursday

Y'ALL.

I WENT OUT.

It's my Coworker BFF's birthday on Sunday, so a few of us went out to celebrate!

I enjoyed:

• Mac Daddy Daiquiris(Pour one out for Chris Kelly)
• Buffalo Deviled Eggs (too spicy for me)
• Fried Brussel Sprouts with Smoked Goat Cheese
• Chicken Liver Mousse On Toast

It was all DELICIOUS. Even the liver. 

I drank and ate and chatted and came home and everything was lovely.

Happy Birthday, Coworker BFF!

A Broken Burrito Heart

Today was supposed to be a magical day.

The Jogasaki Truck was supposed to be near my office today. What is the Jogasaki Truck, you may ask? The Jogasaki Truck brings you sushi...in BURRITO FORM.

Via @UrLocalEmbalmer

But alas, their truck had a generator problem and DIDN'T COME.

My broken heart is crying.

So I had to have regular, boring sushi.

It was just okay.

A Bromantic Date Night

I bought this DVD pack at Target a few weeks ago on sale.

It inspired tonight's night in with my Biff. I definitely knew I wouldn't be in the mood to go out for a third weekend in a row (two is really my max in a one month span, old lady that I am), and of course she was happy to join me for a healthy meal and some puppy snuggles.

Our version of a Bro Date.

I made one of my mama's new best recipes, a strawberry feta salad with poppyseed dressing, added chicken, plus brie and apple crescent rolls!

The rolls were delicious. I'm a pretty remedial cook, as we all know, but I managed not to screw them up. I used low-fat brie, so the cheese wasn't as melty and they weren't as messy, which worked out really well. The salad, of course, was not as tasty as when my mom makes it, but I did alright!

Also, there was wine.

We watched "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" and "40 Year Old Virgin", watched the pups play, and had our usual gossip sessions and bonding.

Good times. Good bro times.

I'm sure bros eat strawberry salad all the time, right?

Tasty Treats

Yesterday my coworker and I took a break from the office and went for frozen yogurt at The Bigg Chill.

We both got graham cracker crust fat-free yogurt with strawberries, and it was amazing.

I have no other point to this post. Just dessert porn, to make you jealous.

Oh, but it was a NSV, to be sure. When my coworker suggested it, my brain wanted to fight with itself immediately over whether I should, but I instantly shut that shit down. I wanted to indulge and that's all that matters.

Also, I didn't finish mine.

Wins all around.

Nonsense Links

Roger Ebert's 20 Most Epic Movie Pans

Rest in peace, Roger. You were seriously a wonderful, hilarious talent.

"I had a colonoscopy once, and they let me watch it on TV. It was more entertaining than The Brown Bunny."

Classical Portraits of Extreme Plastic Surgery

Whoa. This is seriously blowing my mind. Fascinating. Honestly, I often wonder if I'll fall victim to the temptation of plastic surgery, I already detest the lines in my face, but man...

Make Your Own Pizzas That Look Like Cheese-Filled Ice Cream Cones

OH MY GOD I WANT TO PUT IT IN MY MOUTH.

Dogs Wearing Pantyhose, A Popular New Meme in China

I don't know how I feel about this. I think I feel disturbed.

Des Hommes et des Chatons

My whole life has come to this.

Foodie Pen Pals!

I learned about the Foodie Pen Pal exchange from Liz over at Vegging Out In Sac Town (Hi Liz!). Started by Lindsay over at the Lean Green Bean, the Foodie Pen Pal program is pretty awesome: you exchange food care packages with bloggers and blog readers all over the country. Lindsay pairs up all the participants, and you get a package from one person and send to another. SO FUN!

My package came from Carlisa over at Something Infinitely Interesting. Girl must be psychic, 'cause she sent me a box chock full of treats perfectly suited to my tastes, along with a cute card with an adorable cupcake!

One night while it was chilly, I tried some of the Starbucks marshmallow hot cocoa---SO DELICIOUS. 

I've had some tasty Lemon Zinger to start off my mornings at the office, it's one of my very favorite kinds of tea!

Haven't indulged in the mac and cheese yet, but I know it'll be good. Who doesn't love mac and cheese, I mean really.

.

I also got some yummy salad mixings that were awesome, tasty granola snacks, perfect to keep in my desk drawer at work, and some fancy cappuccino toppings you can put on a variety of different stuff like ice cream and what not.

I've been meaning to try Buddy Fruit for weeks now, and lo and behold there it was in my box! I haven't tried it yet, but I can't wait to put it in a smoothie after a morning yoga class.

This program is so cool, and I'm so glad I participated! I had a blast shopping for my box, and getting my package in the mail was the highlight of my day. I definitely will participate again, but I'm going to wait until May when I can make sure I can get to the Farmer's Market to get some really special stuff!

Thank you so so so much to Carlisa for my amazing gifts, and thank you to Lindsay for setting up this awesome exchange! See the rest of the March pals here.

You can read about the package I sent behind the cut:

An Ode to Trader Joe's

I don't believe I've ever given Trader Joe's the praise it deserves on my blog.

So here we go.

HOT DAMN I LOVE YOU TJ'S
YOU MAKE MY SOUL SING
YOU GIVE ME WINGS
AND TASTY THINGS!

(Okay, so I'm no poet.)

So many amazing pre-made and frozen selections, perfect for my lazy self. Such pretty flowers. Such awesome baked goods, not that I make much use of those. Such a great wine and beer selection (though their two buck Chuck is NO LONGER TWO BUCKS).

Look at a few of the tasty dinners I bought myself for next week. Plus, tonight I get raspberry sorbet. Mmmmnom.

And also, there's this!

The Trader Joe's Lesson: How to Pay a Living Wage and Still Make Money in Retail

Did you know that TJ's pays its employees significantly more than other, comparable stores? Yet another reason to love them.

Plus, I find on average their employees are more attractive than Ralph's employees. Just FYI.

Back On Track

A Sunday: The Lovely, The Lazy, The LA Life

Overall I would say this weekend is just about the best I've had in LA for awhile. For reals.

Happy me.

No yoga this morning, though. My alarm went off, and my body said, "Uh, nope. No thank you. Nooo." I was wrecked. In a lovely way, but you know...no. Recovery day. Funny how 135 minutes in a 100 plus degree room, upside down, will make you a little tired.

So I lazed about in bed for awhile, which is truly one of my favorite past times. Popped my smelly cat pee sheets in the wash. Then I finished cleaning my apartment, which really took no time at all once I got right down to it, got it looking oh-so-pretty, parental-ready and shiny. Then I bought purty flowers at the Farmer's Market, and got myself looking almost as purty, and then my parents picked me up for our day out on the town!

Speaking of being purty, or pretty, if we're using grown up language: when I thought over our plans for the day last night, I realized they were exactly the same as a previous Sunday outing almost exactly a year ago: so I wore a variation on the same outfit. 'Cause why not?

• Dress by Old Navy
• Coat by Kut from the Kloth
• Tights by Nordstrom
• Boots by ShoeDazzle ($11!)

First up was lunch at the Napa Valley Grille in Westwood with my sweet baby cousin and her equally adorable boyfriend, seniors at UCLA. Of course, I call her my baby cousin when in actuality she's only a few years younger than me. But when you're a kid, a few years makes someone seem INFANTILE, and I still retain the idea that she's significantly younger than me, even though she's really not. Food was delicious, conversation was fabulous, all was well. I split a seared ahi tuna salad and braised pear and prosciutto with burrata appetizer with my mama. SO GOOD.

Then my parents and I went to see "The Gift" at the Geffen Playhouse staring Kathy Baker, Chris Mulkey, James Van Der Beek, and Jaime Ray Newman. It was awesome and weird and interesting and kinda fucked up and thought provoking and I don't really know what to make of it, but I enjoyed myself. I asked my parents if we could go because the author, Joanna Murray-Smith, wrote a play that I did a scene and monologue from when I was big into acting and drama and whatnot back in the day. Ah, memories.

Then my parents and I went back to my apartment, my mom and I put on comfy clothes, opened a few bottles of wine and chatted and hung out with the kitty and lounged. They were suitably impressed with my clean and well organized apartment. I'm so lucky to have parents that I actually enjoy spending time with as people. I mean, why wouldn't I? they're awesome.

And then I made them dinner! And it was goooood.

Parmesan crusted chicken (my mama's recipe, will post later!) with Emily Bites' balsamic roasted vegetables over mixed baby greens. And more wine. YUM.

And also, cheesecake stuffed strawberries, but no pictures of those, 'CAUSE WE ATE THEM SO FAST.

They hit the road back to Santa Barbara, and I am tucked into bed with my Tree, who was so pleased to have a chance to cuddle with the Daddy again, who was always his favorite. Though, he did seem to pay more attention to the Mommy this time.

And I'm super stoked, cause I just reached the most revered episode of SVU: THE ANIMAL SMUGGLING EPISODE!

Bedtime after that, with sweet sweet dreams of gibbons.

Southern Asian Fusion

My beautiful Biff made me lunch today, after an awesome calorie-burning beach walk with the pack of pups. (Pictures in a bit, of course!) We dined outside in the gorgeous sunshine, and it was delicious.

Check it out.

• Trader Joe's orange chicken
• Sauteed collard, mustard, turnip, and spinach greens with sugar snap peas
• Corn bread

So good. So healthy. Thanks, Biff!

Christmas Eve Evening

Merry Fucking Christmas Eve! (Yes, that expletive was absolutely necessary.)

I am a happy clam (were that clam not about to be made into chowder), 'cause it is Christmas, and I just love my family holidays.

LOVE.

Also, wine helps.

For the most part, traditionally, my Christmases are spent with just my immediate family plus the occasional boyfriend or friend or lonely wanderer. Our extended family is all in Nebraska, and we rarely travel for the holidays, so for the most part I associate Christmas and the like with private time with my beloved parents and darling if infuriating sister. This year, it's just the four of us plus my sister's boyfriend, who I like, so no complaints there, and things are just so damn fun.

Our traditions did get changed around a bit this year, though. Usually,  my mother makes three meals for us greedy hungry folk: Christmas eve, morning and day. This year, she decided (quite rightfully) that one of them needed to go by the wayside, so tonight we went out for dinner, foregoing our traditional oyster stew/chili/clam chowder evening.

The last two years, my parents and I have gone to Wine Cask in Santa Barbara to celebrate New Year's Eve. This year, we decided to try it for the Christmas E.

Butternut squash soup, lamb with pomegranates and mint
with pureed carrot, and a cookie pie.

Pretty damn good! I will say, compared to previous experiences, service/quality of tasty were not quite up to par, but we still had a wonderful experience, and a grand ole time. My family can pretty much have fun anywhere, so that was to be expected.

On the way home we took a detour to one of the streets that is always overdone for Christmas. I would never put a bunch of inflatable characters and illuminated animals on my front lawn for the holidays, but I certainly appreciate those who do.

I'm tucked in bed now, and having trouble sleeping. It doesn't matter how old I get, I still find myself unable to sleep on Christmas Eve, anxious with the promise of the morning's presents and joy and tradition. 

It just makes me happy.

Merry. Fucking. Christmas. 

Weekend Wrap-Up

I am so sorry for my absence these last few days. I know. You missed me awfully terribly much. I'm sorry. I missed you too. But I was off busy being a person in the world, which just happens so rarely, I had to take advantage of it.

As penance, I have so many words and pictures for you. So many.

I had a fantastic Thanksgiving, of course! Food, family, wine...what is there to complain about? I picked up pies (pecan and rhubarb) from Marie Callender's on my way from LA, and got to Santa Barbara around noon or so. Traffic was surprisingly easy, I think the holiday gods were on my side. My sister greeted me with delicious orange-cranberry mimosas, as any good sister would, then I helped my mom in the kitchen most of the afternoon. If by "helped" you mean "provided moral support and jokes while occasionally fetching something or stirring", though I did contribute by making Emily Bites' goat cheese mashed sweet potatoes. Delicious, as was the rest of our meal! Mostly I stuffed myself with stuffing, as you do. Badumdumchhh...?

We dawdled over our dinners, then decided against a movie---as food comas were certainly imminent. I come from a family of gamers...if by gamers, you mean "people who love to play card and word games and not video ones". We played Pitch and Thirteen after dinner, got a little rowdy, laughed nonstop, and poked fun at my father's frustration over losing. And I quote:

Dad: "If you hadn't played that card, I would have won!"

Sis: "If no one else had been playing, you would have won!"

Maybe you had to be there? I promise you, hilarious.

The sister left on Friday morning to head back to San Francisco, and my day was spent helping my mom decorate the house for Christmas. She goes all out with her decorations, but not in the tacky, overly thematic tradition of most Xmas decorating. There are no inflatable Santas or nativity scenes, I promise you. She has so many gorgeous holiday or winter-y things, and it was fun to find places for them all over the house....though also, a lot more work than expected! We didn't even finish half the house. We had scrumptious leftovers for dinner then decorated our (faux) Christmas tree. One of my favorite parts of the holiday season, I love looking at all the ornaments we've collected over the years and reminiscing over the where and the when and the what.Then my mom and I played Banangrams, which is a thoroughly entertaining, Scrabble-like game. I dominate. Words and I, we are very good friends...clearly.

Saturday, there was more decorating, and Mama and I went to lunch at our very favorite Mexican restaurant in Santa Barbara, Los Agaves. I love that place for two reasons: 1) Amazing food. 2) The owner is hot as hell and I like to objectify him. Then the parents and I went to see "Silver Linings Playbook" starring my girl crush/future BFF Jennifer Lawrence. It was a really wonderful movie, and I highly recommend it. Every element was stellar---writing, directing, acting. Yeah, who knew Bradley Cooper could act? I certainly didn't. It was bittersweet and sad but hilarious and heartwarming, and I want to see it again. After the movie my mom had an errand to run, and I got distracted by a shiny new store at Paseo Nuevo downtown. And everything was on sale. So I bought shit. We then went to dinner at The Brewhouse, another one of my favorite Santa Barbara spots. My mom and I did some late night decorating when we got home, then I went over to my BFF's (not Jennifer Lawrence, the real one) for a brief gossip sesh and puppy snuggle. She has a new man, so of course I wanted to hear all about that, and I had some vents to get out. Lucky me, she lives about a 3 minute drive from my parents' place! It would be extraordinarily convenient if I were to move back to SB. Food for thought.

Today began with Sunday pancakes, in the long-standing tradition of my family. Apple-pumpkin ones, made by my mama and absolutely nomtastic. (Yes, food was a big theme this weekend.) Then I had a daddy-daughter date to see "Skyfall", which was full of explosions and sexy Daniel Craig musclature and good times espionage. Enjoyable popcorn flick. And yes, I ate some popcorn, and it was GOOD. Then I just had to return to the store I discovered last night, to try on a dress I'd eyed in the window. Didn't end up buying that one, but did find a few more things...funny, just last week I was saying I wasn't going to buy myself anything until Christmas. Clearly I have problems.

Anyways, today is my parents' 34th anniversary, and I told them I wanted to make dinner for them. I tried my first recipe from Skinny Taste, chicken rollatini with prociutto and cheese, which was absolutely amazing and a big hit with all of us. I also modified one of her salad recipes, substituting baby greens for arugula and gorgonzola for bleu. Awesome! I was really happy with how dinner turned out, and I have the itch to do a little more experimental cooking. We'll see how long that lasts. I convinced the happy couple to watch "Liz & Dick" with me on Lifetime, sure it would be the most amazingly horrifying catastrophe in the history of cinema. It absolutely was, but my parents couldn't appreciate the tragic comedy, and gave up twenty minutes in. Sadness. It really was a wonderfully cheesetastic explosion of bad. You should watch it, as long as you can find the fun in it and not allow yourself to become enraged at the bastardization of Elizabeth Taylor's legacy.

I really should have driven back to LA tonight, but I would rather drink some more wine and lounge about, so that's what I shall do. I hope the sheer quantity of words I've offered you here makes up for my cruel, cruel abandonment of you. Or, you know, not?

G'night, world. 

A Night In

I could not decide what to watch last night. I tried a number of things, and turned them all off within a minute.

Clearly, I just needed brain candy. So I spent the evening watching "My Fair Wedding with David Tutera" and cuddling my cat.

I feel shame.

Clearly his new favorite spot.

Prosciutto and Goat Cheese Salad

So handsome.

Spinach, Mushroom and Sausage Quiche

Y'all, I cooked.

Spinach, Mushroom and Sausage Quiche

From Trader Joe's Recipes

Modifications: 

• Sweet Basil and Pesto Sausage
• 5 whole eggs

WW Point Total: 4pts for one piece, 7pts for two.

Notes:

I took it out too early, despite calling and getting advice from my ever-so-wise mother about what to do when it started to brown on top. I should have just put a little foil over it so the crust could finish cooking, but it smelled amazing and I was hungry. And I am not known for patience. Aside from the slightly soft crust, it was totally delicious, and easy to make. The polenta was really flavorful and filling. I'm going to try it again next week with a different kind of sausage, and a full 45-50 minutes in the oven. 

Blue Moon Cupcakes

 My attempt at beer cupcakes wasn't exactly a failure, as they were delicious, but they didn't taste very beer-y. Perhaps I will try a stronger flavored beer next time. Or more of it.

But look! So pretty.

I took the remainders into work, and they were a hit! Yay me and my sexy domestic skills.