I love you too, Jeasus.

My neighborhood church seems to have a spelling problem.

Religiousity

I just love when people make a driving maneuver that is so blatantly selfish, rude and illegal that you cannot help but laugh to keep from screaming obscenities at them. I especially love it when the car is plastered with Christian bumper stickers. YES, that is exactly how Jesus wants you to drive. LIKE AN ASSHOLE.

Hey, while we're talking about religion, if you haven't noticed, I'm not much of a religious person. At all. My parents raised my sister and I with just about zero exposure to it, save a few nighttime readings of bible stories at my request. There was a brief flirtation with Christianity when I was a pre-teen, when all my friends were going to bible camp and I wanted to go toooooo like all the cooooool kiiiiids. I spent a few summers loving the Jesus and reading the "Left Behind" books and begging my family to get saved so we could all party in heaven together. It didn't take long for my twelve year old brain to go, "Wait, I may be an awkward, roly-poly child with many years of celibacy ahead of her, but eventually I'd like to have some pre-marital sex and maybe make out with a chick, so I don't know if I'm down with this whole 'Christianity' thing, especially 'cause they just made me take a seminar on how to tell other people their religion is wrong ". There ended my brief self-identification as a Christian.

For a few years after that I called myself "spiritual". I wasn't quite sure what I believed but I was pretty sure I believed in God, and maybe Jesus too, but not all those silly rules, and maybe karma and also reincarnation sounded pretty cool. And fairies. Nowadays I'm not even sure if I believe anything, I guess agnostic is the appropriate term to apply to myself?

This whole post is leading up to my decision to give up Diet Coke for Lent despite my complete lack of Catholic faith.

Why? Because I don't want to. Because I am addicted to it. Because I don't think I'll actually be able to do it. Because it will be hard. Because I am ROTTING MY TEETH. Because plenty of other people give shit up for Lent that aren't Catholic, so why shouldn't I join the fun? Or the lack of fun, as it were.

So, yeah. Starting tomorrow, no Diet Coke until Easter. That's right, right? When this Lent business ends? I should probably look that up.

After I'm done chugging this last can of crack.

SHOUTY FEMINIST HIPPIE

For the most part, I have kept it pretty light on this blog. Or, the less light stuff, comes from my own pathetic emotional fuckery. I figure, there are dozens of people better qualified than myself out there on the Internet, writing about all the important shit, so I'll just talk about kitties and shoes and pretty boys.

But in the last week or so, I have been overwhelmed with so many stories from the news that literally make me sick to my stomach.

A candidate for Senate spouting bullshit theories about legitimate rape and pregnancy, then insisting he was just misunderstood. A teenager sexually assaulted then publicly blamed for ruining her attacker's life. Paul Ryan's very existence.

But it's not just the US---in the Dominican Republic, a sixteen year old girl discovered she had leukemia while she was nine weeks pregnant. The chemotherapy she needed would kill the fetus, however, violating the country's anti-abortion law---so she was denied treatment for 20 days before the courts made up their minds. And then she died.

What is WRONG with this world!?!?

I just I can't even start. The SEXISM. The VICTIM-BLAMING. THE STUPIDITY. I just try to form a good logical response and I can't...LOUD NOISES.

You're telling me my body is SO DAMN ADVANCED that I can physically SHOOT RAPIST SPERM away from my eggs? And if I get pregnant, that's MY OWN DAMN FAULT. I gotta birth that damn baby, oh and also, you probably won't have programs to help me raise it. OH, AND ALSO MY FAULT? Getting RAPED. 'Cause I was just drunk and slutty, and you know, FEMALE, and maybe I should keep my mouth shut so I don't make my poor attackers FACE ANY PUNISHMENT? 'Cause you know, boys will be boys and all. Not like they should be held ACCOUNTABLE OR ANYTHING. I SHOULD APOLOGIZE FOR HAVING A VAGINA.

OH AND ALSO. MAYBE A FERTILIZED EGG IS LESS OF A PERSON THAN A FULLY FORMED TEENAGER? MAYBE?

I JUST CAN'T RESIST CAPS.

FLAMES. ON THE SIDE OF MY FACE.

I wouldn't say that I'm incredibly well educated when it comes to politics. Fiscal issues, debt ceiling, tax rates, blahdiddlyblah. The only issues I tend to debate and focus on are social ones. Gay marriage. Birth control. What the hell I'm allowed to do with my own vagina. Etc. You know, relevant stuff.

I'm going to make a pretty controversial statement here:

 At this point, I honestly do not understand a moral defense for voting Republican in the upcoming election. I cannot speak to every individual candidate or supporter, but the party as a whole has tied itself to so much sexism, racism, and general bigotry that I cannot comprehend a reason you would want them in power. Is your money really more important to you than the rights of your fellow citizens? And if you're voting with your hateful social and religious beliefs in mind, do you understand the concept of separation of church and state? Do you realize the general platform of oppression championed by your party is designed to drag me by my hair, kicking and screaming, back into the 1950s?

It makes me sad that elephants, my favorite animal, have been appropriated by this tragic, antiquated party.

Okay, deep breaths.

I think I'm done.

For now.

EDITED TO ADD:

Well, I just found this article, which basically is my point exactly, except WAY BETTER WRITTEN.