How To Have Perspective

Okay, so I scraped up my car.

And it was upsetting.

But you know what? I didn't get in an accident. I wasn't at risk of injury, nor was anyone else. It could have been so much worse.

My car is driveable. I have a car. It's not dented, it's just scraped. It could be bigger. When I looked at it this morning it's actually smaller than I thought it was all of last night. And it could have been the handle or something functional, right?

And I did it myself, I didn't find it in a parking lot. It wasn't the result of human indecency. I don't have to curse the world and stew in loathing for others. (I just have to get past it for myself.)

And I didn't hit another car. I don't owe anyone money.

Perspective.

It's a beautiful thing.

All By Myself

Last week, my therapist let me know that she wouldn't be available for our Wednesday session. She offered to fit me in on another day, but I was like, "Oh, no, I'm fine, I'm not so crazy that I can't go a week without seeing you."

Well.

It's Wednesday, and I am in a mood.

A sad mood. A lonely mood. I am home, and all should be well, but I am just...morose.

Maybe it's that I'm sick. Maybe it's that I can't go to yoga. Maybe it's the weather, dreary but without the rain I love so much. Maybe it's the fact that I have no friends.

Someone love me?

Thought Dump

I have SO. MANY. THOUGHTS.

Here they are. In a haphazardly organized fashion.

'Cause it's Monday.

Fuck Monday.

1) I am probably going to make it through an entire box of tissues today. DAMN MY LEAKY NOSE.

2) My sexy hoarse Vegas voice turned into a hacking cough. It's very attractive.

3) Considering items 1 and 2, you'd think I'm sick, but I feel fine otherwise. Allergies, I guess? I AM SUCH A HOT MESS.

4) I'm wearing my new dress (a gift from me to me) again today. Two compliments before noon! I snort compliments like cocaine. OR I WOULD IF MY NOSE WASN'T STUFFY.

5) My birthday flowers lasted over the weekend and bloomed bigger and prettier than before! I will take them home with me tonight.

6) Tonight will be a night of productivity. Noooo laptop, even though that's not even on my goal list. Who AM I? I will put away all my nice clean laundry, and I will do some goddamn dishes, and I will deal with the cat litter situation, and I will vacuum.

7) And then I will sleeeeep. I swear, I have still not caught up since Vegas.

Headache

This morning, my brain is leaking out my eyeballs.

I refuse to believe this has anything to do with a measly three glasses of wine. Besides, this is not a hangover headache, this is a "oh hello spring and your naughty little blooming weeds, GET IN MY SINUSES". 

Why does everything happen to ME?!

Pout.