Sunday, January 6, 2013

Ho Fo Sho

Golly gee folks, I'm sorry for the lack of posts today. I guess that's what happens when you wake up and get dressed and immediately leave your apartment/the Internet to go have a life.


But today sure was a good day.

This morning I celebrated the birthday of one my very few "LA-friends" (by which I mean someone I became friends with after I moved here, not long-time friends who happen to live here like The Married Couple). I met up with her and a group of her compadres, only one of whom (who?) I'd met before, for brunch. But this was not your standard classy, sophisticated brunch, with table bread and cucumber flavored water and linen napkins.


This was a drag brunch.

What's a drag brunch, you say?

That's a drag brunch.

Bottomless mimosas, good ole diner food, and drag queens  (and one king!) performing for our dolla dolla bills, y'all. It. Is. Fabulous. Lots of lip-syncing and grinding and lots of squealing and shrieking on the audience's part. These ladies were hilaaarious, and hot as shit. The emcee, a Ms. Wendy Ho, sang herself (divaaa) and changed the lyrics up to all her songs. Beauty and the Beast's "Bonjour!" featured "there goes the hooker with her pimp like always!" Rihanna's "We Found Love" was changed to "suck your dick in a puuublic plaaace".

Our table was front and center for all the action, and the birthday girl competed in a booty shakin' competition---and won, of course. I'm only friends with winners.

So yeah, an absolutely grand time was had by all. Pretty much the most fun one can have on a Sunday morning. You hos should probably get to Hamburger Mary's in West Hollywood and find out for yourself what it's like to eat a fatty breakfast with an ass better than yours shaking in your face. Although, I do warn you ladies, the problem with going out in WeHo is you will be surrounded by a vast sea of gorgeous, fit, well-groomed men---none of whom are interested in your ladybits. Sigh.

After brunch, I quickly stopped in at the Crossroad Trading Co. across the street to finally try to sell some clothes. Only took me a year, and only made $20, but still, not too shabby. I'm gonna spend it on drugs. Or maybe food.

Then I got on the 101 and headed north to meet my parents in Camarillo for a viewing of "The Impossible", which I really enjoyed, much more than "Django Unchained" yesterday. The acting was incredible. We then had a nice dinner, and I enjoyed polenta cakes with sauteed spinach. Tasty.

Home before 9 to a very disgruntled Bentley, unused to me leaving on the weekends. Poor baby. Alas, in my quest for a social life, he'll have to get used to sleeping on his own, and not on my face.

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