5:07 AM Wake up with 60 pound dog on your feet.
5:22 AM Wake up with 60 pound dog in your face.
6:44 AM Wake up when Dog jumps down off the bed, take him upstairs to go to the bathroom.
7:01 AM Dog jumps off the bed again. You ignore him, 'cause Dog already went potty.
7:05 AM Dog starts to puke. You leap out of bed and let him out the front door, sparing the carpet too much damage.
7:15 AM You finish removing the stain from the carpet.
7:30 AM Dog finishes acting like he has to be sick again, and finally lays down. You are now awake for the day.