Monday, July 1, 2013


There's a feeling I sometimes get when I'm alone, a rush of optimism or motivation that overtakes me, and I know I can do anything I fucking set my mind to. This feeling of power is intoxicating and exhilarating and all those things you want a good feeling to be. It's the promise of change. It's the idea of a new beginning. It's everything I've ever wanted.

It's hope.

It's usually found later in the evening, after a couple of hours of nothingness, time wasted, spent face to face with a screen. I get fed up with myself and my monotony, I get bored, and I'm struck with the desire to do more. Be more.

And I swear, tomorrow's the day. I get to planning. I make schedules and lists and I imagine all the ways it could be. Google calendar and I become great friends, my iPhone alarm clock is set just so. I plot.

If I could bottle that motivation, that feeling, I'd make a gazillion dollars. I'd never be lazy. I'd would never again disappoint myself.

Tomorrow's the day, I always say.

Let's see if it is.

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