Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Dating Reel Highlights

So my experiment with Internet dating has been interesting, at the least, and successful at best, if you count a scheduled next date with an adorable redhead as a success. Which I certainly do.

I met three guys off the site in the first week. I saw one of them a second time, and the third, the Ginger, a second, third and soon to be fourth. I've chatted back and forth with a few guys in the past few weeks, but no one has totally tickled my fancy, and honestly the whole first date thing is kind of draining and I'm so lazy. I have one new guy I may see next week when he returns from a business trip, but until then I'm content with my one date a week schedule with a deliciously witty paramedic-in-training. Unless a Michael Fassbender lookalike messages me and offers me pie. Then we'll see.

So, throughout this past month or so of dating, there have been a handful of interesting moments and discussion-worthy topics. And lucky you, I'm going to share.

Follow me below the cut for some romance...

Date #1 with Bachelor #1

We are standing awkwardly at my car saying goodnight. He is drunk. I am a wee bit tipsy. Awkward kiss, mostly so I could get out of there. I get in my car, and look up to see a woman standing next to the car in front of me, with a guy, doing the same awkward dance. She smiles at me, twists her face quizzically and wiggles her hands in an unmistakable, "So, how was it?" I wrinkle my nose and wave my hands back, "So-so?" We laugh. It was an amazing moment of girl solidarity, straight off the teevee. Also, sort of the best part of the date. No offense, dude.

Date #1 with Bachelor #2

This bachelor was British, and as I mentioned in a post a few weeks ago, his accent was just damn sexy. He was pretty cute too, don't get me wrong, but the accent took him up a few points. Of course, the problem was that I was so distracted by his voice that I sort of missed that he was a douche. For instance, he suggested we meet somewhere "in between", then suggested a bar. I drove 45 minutes in traffic and the asshole walked. And he throws out there within the first 10 minutes or so how he just hates "girls who know who pretty they are. Yuck!" So much venom. Now, I understand the sentiment, no one likes an egotistical bitch. But as a girl you're on a date with, how am I supposed to respond to that? "Well, I don't think I'm pretty"? "Lucky for you, I'm a dog"? I just uncomfortably took a sip of my drink.

He also couldn't wait the 15 seconds for the valet to get my car. He just had to walk home.

He did not call, nor did I want him to.

Date #1 with Bachelor #3

I was particularly excited about this date, due to my deep abiding love for the ginger people. And I will say that from the second I walked in and met this guy, I've been a weensy teensy bit smitten. He's just fun. When compared to Bachelors #1 and #2, with whom I felt alternately awkward, hyper, boring, or like some sort of performing monkey with an arsenal of hilarious stories, I have felt nothing but 100% comfortable and natural with the Ginger.

Most memorable moment from our first date: He put his hand on my thigh for maybe three seconds. I just about died. Is that what chemistry feels like?

Date #2 with Bachelor #1

I don't really know why I agreed to a second date with this guy. I guess I like to give a second shot if they want it. I mean, he appreciated my wacky self, that had to give him some points. And he was definitely cute in a hipster-y way, good job, no creeper vibes. But my issues on Date #1 were back in full force on Date #2: he was a little too fixated on how much and how fast he could drink, we barely had any chemistry, conversational or otherwise, and honestly...he had a little bit of Nerd Voice. I can't handle NV.

I cut the date short. NEXT.

Date #2 with Bachelor #3:

The Ginger suggested playing pool, and once again came all the way out my way for our date. Bonus points: earned. Chivalry: obvious. He kicked my ass. He bought me beers. Then we went back to my place like big dorks and watched Planet Earth. Which is awesome.

And I'm not going to complain about a man who knows how to cuddle.

Date #3 with Bachelor #3:

His suggestion: A charity wine-tasting event at Barnsdall Art Park in Hollywood and a picnic.
My response (paraphrased, and expressed with a little less enthusiasm): BEST DATE IDEA EVER.

Totally romantic. Absolutely gorgeous. We happened to run into a friend of his who invited us to a bar later that night for birthday festivities, and the Ginger wanted to go. Which meant I met some of his friends. A good sign, one would think?

Moment of note: So we show up to the bar, and my date says "hi" to a pair of girls, then turns to talk to the birthday boy. Me being me, I instantly turn to the girls all full of friendly and say, "HI!" One of them was mid-shot, we laughed awkwardly, and the Ginger pulled me away to say, "Yeah, sorry, that's my ex-girlfriend."

Whoops. "Which one?"

"The one that doesn't look happy to see me."

I'm still amused.

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