Sunday, April 8, 2012

Rehab for the Domestically Disinclined

Y'all, I'm turning into one hell of a kitchen queen. No lie.

I've never been much of a cook. You give me a box of brownie mix with three step instructions and I will inevitably miss a step, spill all over myself, and forget to pre-heat the oven. When I do finally slide my delicious treats into it, I'm so goshdarn proud, I pour myself a glass of wine in celebration and forget about them until they end up a charred brick of broken chocolate dreams.

It's a little pathetic.

Since I started living alone, I've mostly subsisted on Trader Joe's delights, scrambled eggs, frozen dinners and take-out---not exactly the diet of champions. Overall, cooking has always been annoying, stressful, and time consuming. Why make something myself if I can go out and BUY it? My quest to eat healthier started in January, and I upped my game (Oooh stir-frys! Oooh salads!), but I was starting to get really bored.

So, I tried a recipe. Emily Bites Lasagna "Cupcakes", to be exact. And they were amaaazing. And tasted like real grown-up food, who woulda thought? Then I tried her Cheesy Taco Pasta. Indulgent and incredible. Then, for a week straight, I ate a Taco Wrap Deluxe every single day. Hello, guilt-free Taco Bell? I AM ALL OVER IT.

I had a little baby epiphany---if I follow recipes and you know, pay attention, I can make delicious healthy things for CHEAP?! Simple math that has eluded me for years.

Today, I feasted on her Banana Pancake Bites, which were so damn good I ate every single one over the course of the day. (Yeah, I still have moderation issues.) This week I also tried her Zucchini Squares, which, zomg, soooo good for breakfast or dinner!

(Clearly, this post should just be titled "An Ode To Emily Bites".)

I'm actually starting to enjoy cooking, believe it or not. It can still be a little tedious to me, but I just turn on a dinner-themed playlist and get my cook on, often awkwardly dancing around the kitchen with food in my hair. I have a whole Pinterest board full of things I'm stoked to try, and I have fashioned a new fantasy future myself:

Domestic Goddess. High heels, sexy apron, plate full of joy.

I am going to bake the shit out of life, and you will all fall in love with me via your bellies.

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